Friday, April 9, 2010

Widow?


I recently had to sign some papers. I showed up to the appointment with much anticipation. "This is my first business transaction to do all by myself" I said to myself. (Bill was an expert at it) I sat down at the conference table and looked at the stack of paperwork in front of me. Oh my gosh!.......

Debra A. Rooney, Widow

Are you kidding? That's what I am now? A widow?
I'm in shock and feel a little light headed.
I just don't want to believe it.
I wish there was a better word.
I'm feeling a little sorry for myself.
Don't I always get to check the married box?
I don't even have any pictures by myself!
Do I have to accept this? Do I have a choice?
Not really. It's what I am now.
I don't like it.

9 comments:

Stacey said...

Two years into this new status and I am still reeling from that word. Every time I have to use that word to describe myself is a reopening of the wound. And I don't know when that will change.

Anonymous said...

Dang...the things we never see coming. I am at a loss for words; it never occurred to me that to describe you in one word. Maybe we should meet with Janie and a little vino, and discuss other options. Stick with Gramma; it has a joyful ring to it. love you, cathy z

erynn said...

I went through this too when I bought my house.. I wanted to ask why it had to say there every time after my name... did it really matter in that particular transaction?

erynn said...

oh and when I signed W up for preschool too.. I hate that I have to leave the lines blank where it asks for the Father's information.

Anonymous said...

In conversation with my friends, I have had a tough time giving you that title, so I don't. You are Bill's wife, the one we lost.
Love you all so much, Dad

Anonymous said...

No matter what 'paperwork' says, I believe you will always be Bill's wife. You are a wife Debbie, unfortunately a wife who lost her husband, but a wife none the less. Please do not allow 'paperwork' to define who you are and the relationship you had with your husband.

Hugs.

Bec.

Anonymous said...

No matter what 'paperwork' says, I believe you will always be Bill's wife. You are a wife Debbie, unfortunately a wife who lost her husband, but a wife none the less. Please do not allow 'paperwork' to define who you are and the relationship you had with your husband.

Hugs.

Bec.

Jasmine said...

Amen to Bec's post. You and Erynn are still wives - wives who have had to suffer greatly when your husbands were gathered to Heaven, but wives nonetheless. The Lord our God made it so on your blessed wedding days and nothing can change that! Praying for you.

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